U.S. to Confiscate All Whistles Owned by Federal Workers

OSHA Cites Unsafe Decibel Levels and Barking Security Dogs

Seeking to curb the increased blowing of whistles in Federal workplaces, the Occupational Safety and Health Administration is giving U.S. workers 30 days to turn in their whistles. “False fire alarms used to be our biggest noise problem,” explained one OSHA official. “But with all the whistle-blowing these days, our noise pollution is out of control. Something had to be done.”