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Volume CVI No. 68
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New Rules Allow Pro Quarterbacks to Tase Pass Rushers

New Rules Allow Pro Quarterbacks to Tase Pass Rushers

Hoping to keep pro football quarterbacks safer than ever, a new rule will allow signal-callers to tase on-rushing defenders. “Dude, how was I supposed to hit a downfield receiver in stride with some huge guy in my face?” explained one relieved QB. “Now I can just zing’em and sling it!”

[pi•tahrd] 1. an explosive device formerly used in warfare

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